Pet Fish and Secret Daughters
Wills are definitely not a funny thing. And not that death is a laughing matter, but the items or belongings that people sometimes leave behind can be rather odd, if not amusing. In death, people have managed to find joy, confusion, and lots and lots of anger.
People leave everything from extravagant amounts of money to their pets, and mere pennies to their own children. Then there are people who gave away their fortunes and those who used said fortunes to do some super crazy things, including putting down animals, feeding cats, giving money to secret kids, and more. Anonymous lawyers reveal the craziest things they’ve seen in wills, and this info is a tad mind-numbing…
Wrong Name, Grandpa
I’m a qualified solicitor, and my favorite two stories are these: when a lady wanted to create a trust fund of £100,000 for her pet fish. When I asked if it was a special kind of fish, she confirmed it was just a normal goldfish, but she wanted it to be fed fresh avocado every day and be looked after by a local dog walker after she died. She was absolutely serious….
Another lady confessed she had a secret daughter (while she was married to another man; no idea how she hid that from her husband), and she wanted to leave the daughter some money and photographs without the rest of her family finding out. Even her husband doesn’t know. That’ll be a fun conversation when she passes away. Reddit user: scarlett_pimpernel
9 Lives
My grandfather left me $1.00 in his will. He had dementia and confused my dad ripping him off with me; we had the same name, unfortunately. Legally, he shouldn’t have been allowed to do it under his condition, but no one knew at the time (he only confided in me). He left the rest of the family between $100,000 and a few million dollars each, which really sucked for me since I was his favorite….
They all said they felt horrible because they knew the details, but not horrible enough to give up any of their shares. The way I see it is it was never my money to begin with, so it’s not a loss. I’m just glad my sister got a hundred thousand; she needed it more than any of the others. Reddit user: [redacted]
Goofy Request
I’m not a lawyer, but an aging woman my family knew left her house (large, and in a very affluent neighborhood) and estate to family friends when she died. The stipulation was that as long as her cats were alive and taken care of in said house, they could keep it. It seemed like a pretty sweet deal; they just had to keep the cats alive….
But after they died, the house was to be sold and the remaining estate donated to various charities, including cat shelters in the country and abroad. The weird thing is, it’s been like 20 years and the cats are still alive. Also, they’ve changed color, so much so that they look nothing like they used to. Imagine that. Reddit user: EndlessArgument
Thousands of Books
I once had a husband and wife come in. They were middle-aged and had a modest quantity of assets and several adult children. Otherwise, they were unremarkable. The wife was a little serious and quiet, but he was an absolute riot; he had a really great personality and was genuinely interesting. We were discussing burial instructions when he told me that he wanted to include binding instructions in his will….
They would require his executor to cremate his remains and mix his ashes with epoxy, which would then be molded into a statue of Goofy (yes, the Disney character) and given to his eldest daughter. He told me this seriously, and his wife looked mortified. He insisted he wasn’t kidding, and the wife relented. He told me that he “wanted to leave this world with a laugh.” Reddit user: Logical5
Sheer Entertainment Value
Here’s one from one of my dad’s law partners. He had a lady come in with an itemized list of books and wanted her will to contain all of the books and who would get what based on her choosing. So basically she decided who gets what specific book instead of letting her beneficiaries decide.
She had even divided them into different genres to make the process easier….The truly astonishing thing is how many books and how specific she got. According to dad’s law partner, her list was at about 2,000 books to be divided among about 30 people.
She was apparently very specific and she makes sure to come back at least once every year to add all the new books that she’s gotten. My father is sure that there has got to be now at least 3,000 books in the collection. Reddit user: littleredbird1991
One Last Joke
One super-wealthy lady had a huge section for the care and wellbeing of her pets, with primary and successor caretakers, a certain amount of money from the trust for care and feeding of each pet (one pet owner might receive 3k a month to take care of one of her pets after she passed), and certain stipulations on how they were to be cared for….
While some might see it as excessive, the language and stipulations she had and how they were referred to showed that she really, really loved her pets. In that same will and trust, she also left a slew of people only one dollar so that there would be no chance they could take the trust to probate court on the basis that they were merely forgotten….
That part had so much subtle shade . A lot of “they know what they did,” “they are well aware of their guilt in the matter,” etc. Then she split up about two million dollars among five or six different animal rescues and animal welfare charities. It was around 200 pages long, and I swear I read the entire thing just for the sheer entertainment value. Reddit user: Harmonic_Content
Man and Beast Alike
My great uncle’s official will gave the contents of his outhouse to the city council of a nearby town. He did that after they’d tried to take his land twice to build a new water treatment plant. He knew that they would somehow get the land by buying it from his sons, so he wanted some control even in death….
He spent quite a few years fighting eminent domain claims and just wanted to give them something in return. In addition to the land they would no doubt soon gain, that is. So, as a joke, his kids boxed up all the books and magazines in the outhouse and dropped them off at city hall. The officials caught wind and had a nice laugh about it. Reddit user: gaurddog
Three Things
This was not a will, but a deed. The city I work for was renovating a small park that was donated to the city in the 1910s. We went looking through the hand-written deed for easements or other restrictions and found that the family could claw the property back if the park was not “perpetually provided with a fountain of pleasant running water fit for consumption by man and beast alike….”
Even though this was done more than a hundred years ago, the family still has descendants in town, so we installed a new water fountain with a dog bowl filler just to be safe. Recently, we heard that a few of them went by to see the park, so it was a good thing that we added in the pet fountain, even though it was last minute. Reddit user: Sandor17
Toblerone
My grandfather left my uncle three things from his rather valuable estate. The first was one dollar in unrolled pennies. Weird and mean, right? The second was a framed copy of the contract my uncle signed many, many years ago saying he owed my grandfather approximately $100k that he never repaid. But the last thing was what really had me speechless….
The third thing was a framed copy of the letter my uncle sent my grandfather saying he was disowning my grandfather for “being cheap,” with my grandfather having written “accepted douche” and signed his name. I was only a kid, but I understood and laughed at it when I heard my uncle cursing my grandfather to the attorney. Reddit user: voxnemo
The Forced Will
I’m not a lawyer, but my grandpa put in his will a chocolate bar for every one of his grandkids. Well, I have like 12 cousins, and it’s very difficult to track down where a couple of them went. All the estates and money he had in the will were at a standstill for months because they couldn’t find my couple cousins….
We had to show the court that we put in effort to hire someone to track them down, etc. The lawyer that was helping execute the will was blown away that this lawyer allowed this and why he wouldn’t highly suggest not to do it. But I’m not complaining, because I got a Toblerone out of the deal! Reddit user: rv14guy
An Elaborate Will
When I was in my early twenties, I was forced to write a will due to the health insurance I get at work, and, amongst sensible stuff, the in-house lawyer said it was totally okay for this clause to be added: “My funeral wishes are that I be buried in a coffin which has been spring-loaded, such that opening the coffin would cause alarm to future archeologists….”
It was actually pretty hilarious that the lawyer said that I could write this in. I then had to add a bunch of stuff about if this is too costly, I’d be cremated and have my ashes scattered in a specific place. I have every intention to change it when I get older, but it was so much fun at the moment, because I never wanted to write the will to begin with. Reddit user: WanderCold
A Lifelong Job
My own grandmother specified which of the children and grandchildren should get which of the family recipes, and somehow felt the need to include commentary about why. One recipe was this Prohibition-era recipe for beer that I knew my uncle wanted, but she left it to me with the comment that “I know you wanted it, Teddy, but she has the second-best penmanship of the girls and will make you a copy….”
About eight pages later, among the specific descriptions of her vast collection of romance novels (really) was a line: “And [specific Jude Devereaux title] to Spidey, who will please subtract about half the hops before she copies the beer recipe for her Uncle Teddy so that any of us can drink it. Our Jon had his IPA last summer and just about died….”
Uncle Jon just about burst into tears laughing, and Uncle Teddy had long since left the room because he didn’t care about romance novels. I have no idea how she got this will done. My guess is she wrote it herself and the law students who came to her independent-living building signed off on it. It was…elaborate, that’s for sure. Reddit user: spiderqueendemon
Who Got Her Name
I’m not a lawyer (yet), but I came across the case of a super-rich owner of a private bank who left his shares to his sons under the condition and restraint that they will act as managers of the private bank, but with a personal liability concerning the bank’s debt. What he did was give them the money and commit them to lifelong work in the bank while putting their own assets at risk….
So when one of the sons decided to sell his shares because he was old and sick, the courts had to decide whether he got any money from the will; the condition was NOT fulfilled anymore, as he gave up the manager position. One other son wanted to sell his shares, of course, and that would not have been allowed under the condition either. It was brutal. Reddit user: ottos-mops
A Silk Moth and a Furby
I’m not a lawyer (currently a law student), but when I used to work as a paralegal in college, I was digitizing paper records for this new estate lawyer who’d joined our firm in a merger. One will was from 1986, and it included a provision that stipulated which of her three sons would be allowed to name one of their children after her….
Apparently, her name had been “in the family for time eternal,” and she wanted to make sure the best son was the one who carried it on. It also included a summary of why only one of them (the youngest son) was worthy of the right. It’s so specific, and honestly pretty freaking cruel to the other two. Reddit user: waaaaaaaaaaaat_
The Bags of Coins
When my great aunt who I barely had any relationship with died, I discovered that in her will, she left me a taxidermied giant silk moth that she had hanging on her wall. Evidently someone told her about my love for bugs. I still have it, and it’s one of the coolest things in my collection of odd knickknacks. I didn’t know how to feel, but I was grateful….
She left my cousin a Furby. She thought it was a compliment. Evidently she really loved that Furby (she was lonely and had to give up her beloved dog because her assisted living apartment didn’t allow pets, so the Furby was the only friend she had to talk to most of the time), and it didn’t occur to her that it wouldn’t be the greatest gift ever to someone else. Reddit user: PBandJoe
Well, That Was Blunt
When my great grandad died, he left a really strange list of requests behind. The will he had made stated that his really valuable coin collection be split equally across his family. There were like eight or nine of us and three potato sacks full of coins. So, we all gathered around a table and took one coin each until nothing was left….
And among the coins was an Iron Cross, which was quite odd, as the only person on that side of the family that went to war was his dad; he served with the ANZACs in WW1. No one wanted to take it, but I did. It ended up being worth thousands of dollars at a local pawn shop. Reddit user: X_TheRussianSquid_X
The Lottery
I once had a client who came to me wanting to write a will. She needed no guidance whatsoever, since she knew exactly what she wanted to leave behind and who she wanted to give it to. Here’s how the will went: “To my daughter Anne, who created my beautiful granddaughter Jane, and her dear fourth husband John, who laid hands on my Jane, I leave one dollar, you money-grubbing fools….”
I was pretty shocked, but I had to keep typing, “To Jane, I leave all of my monetary assets, save $500 and my best gun, which I leave to my son Bill, on the condition that he beats John up during the time between my funeral and my burial. Jane, bail your uncle out of jail, please.” It was hilarious! Reddit user: UndeadKitten
Constant Changes
Lots of people sending their friends and family on weird errands to spread their ashes (leaving money for people to take trips and spread their ashes around the world) is what I’ve seen when it comes to people writing wills. Pet trusts are a fun one: leaving a whole stack of money in a trust to be used for the care of the pet during their life….
However, my favorite ever (that I obviously didn’t draft) was a lawyer who left the bulk of his estate (millions in today’s dollars) to whatever Toronto-area woman had the most children at a specific date some years in the future. It was absolutely crazy but perfectly legal. I recall the winner had 10 children, and she was pretty freaking happy when she won. Reddit user: PirateRobotNinjaofDe
He Left Them Something
I worked for a lawyer editing changes he had wanted to make to wills. There was one older woman, about 84, who was, in simplest terms, quite insane and would call every single month to change her will. It would always be small details such as removing her daughters because they hadn’t called her in a while or increasing one child’s percentage and lowering another’s based on whether she was mad at them or not….
But one part she would never change was what she would leave for her dog. She wanted to leave her dog $25,000, plus more money for the care of her dog and to make sure she lived comfortably. Sadly, her dog passed away before her, and she had to remove that part from her will. So she just went back to playing with the percentages her daughters would receive. Reddit user: annabear12
Riding My Bike Upside Down
I’m not a lawyer, but my grandpa (not by blood) had two blood daughters who disowned him when I was really young, as they’d been brainwashed by their mother. When they found out he was sick, they came snooping around asking about the will, and we wouldn’t let them near him, but we let him know. He managed to change a few of the details before he died, and this is what happened….
In his will, he left them each a dollar with the note “so you can’t say I didn’t leave you anything.” Also, in both of my grandparents’ wills, it was stated that no matter who passes first, their ashes were to be put in the same urn and mixed/stirred up together. I just thought that was so cute. They were truly soulmates. Reddit user: Lovely_STAR
Leaving Her Some Happiness
A guy on the reservation had no family but was big into his Harley. In his will, he wanted everything to go to the tribe. However, he said he wanted to be buried with the bike, in riding position, upside down, under his favorite stretch of road. We spent quite some time explaining why this was not likely to happen for him….
He was insistent that his buddies already knew the deal and agreed. He just wanted it in writing for the rest of his assets. With a few different clauses, we put it in with some contingencies. It was interesting but honestly more of a headache than anything else. I don’t expect this to be enforced, but if his riding buddies just do it anyway, at least in spirit, I wouldn’t be surprised. Reddit user: motherinlawstongue
Leave It All to My Horse
I had a neighbor whose dad passed away. She had a couple million coming her way; she was doing well for herself, but not that well. Anyway, her dad put it in the will that in order to receive the money, she had to first marry her partner. They had been together for a while, but right before he passed, gay marriage became legal….
Then he wanted her to put an in-ground pool in her backyard: something she always wanted to do but didn’t feel comfortable spending the money needed to do so. It was pretty awesome stuff. While she was devastated he was gone, it seemed he wanted to try and make her as happy as possible after he was gone instead of just giving the money to her. Reddit user: defiant_edge
Viking Funeral Pyres
My two weeks working in probate while in law school paid off! I wasn’t the person who wrote the will because I was a 3L (law school). I couldn’t yet give legal advice, just information, so I did the client interviews and stuff like that. She wanted to leave all her land and stuff to her horse…one that she only had for three months….
And so I was like okay, we can set up an animal trust where the funds will be dedicated to take care of your horse and she argued with me. “No, I don’t want someone to take care of the horse, I want everything to be left to the horse.” I just wrote down what she wanted and let the attorney deal with that. I wasn’t getting paid enough for that nonsense. Reddit user: lsda
You’re Not Really in Charge
I’m not a lawyer, but I was in the military for context. Before I left for Afghanistan, I attempted to get a viking funeral pyre as described in Nick Offerman’s GQ interview in my will. The JAG (military attorney) laughed so hard he was in tears. Evidently, it’s not possible, but he said it’s possible to add it to my Record of Emergency Data as a mere suggestion….
I convinced the wife, before I left, that a funeral pyre or having my ashes shot out of a cannon (like Dr. Hunter S Thompson) were the only two viable options. And while she looked at me like I was crazy and then proceeded to question my sanity, she agreed. I really hope it happens, because it’s everything I want at my own funeral. Reddit user: TheGoatEmoji
Taking Care of the Wife
I’m not a lawyer, but my dad’s will specified that my brother got his guitar collection (favorite), my other brother got his model plane collection (second), and my sister and I got nothing. It actually specified that in the will. He also set aside the remainder of his financial assets for the grandkids for their education. If they don’t use it within a specified time period, it’s donated to hospice….
The kicker was, he thought he was in control of a trust asset that he wasn’t, so we all ended up with some money. Haha! His remaining liquid assets have proven to be very difficult to find for the grandchildren and their education. His sister (who despises all of us) cannot be found, and she’s the trustee. Reddit user: Babsmitty
If Anyone Disputes It…
I’m not a lawyer, but one of my cousins discovered something mildly interesting while doing genealogical research. In the late 1800s, one of my ancestors was widowed and remarried and put conditions in his will to care for his second wife. If his son wanted to inherit the farm, he had to permit his stepmother to live there for the rest of her life in a little cottage….
She had the right to cook in the kitchen in the main house and plant in a section of the garden. Every year, she was to receive X many bushels of apples, X many bushels of potatoes, and X much firewood cut and stacked at her door. It gives a glimpse of how hard life was in the 1880s if your old age pension consists of firewood and apples. Reddit user: I_swear_it_is_true
One Last Night on Me
My sibling has never been able to keep a job, and my parents provide for her. And it drives me absolutely nuts. They keep a ledger of all of their expenditures for her living expenses and a proviso, which I’ve seen, will split their assets between us 50/50. Then we have to subtract her ledger total from her half, adjust for inflation, and add it to mine….
My father also added what he called a “poison pill” codicil that states that if anyone disputes the will and loses, they will receive an adjusted amount of ONLY $5. He’s a heartless guy and I love him. Why? Because I know if anyone is likely to dispute it, it’s my sister. I love the fact that they protected me in death. Reddit user: justme_allthetime
The Three Tasks
I work as a lawyer, and there was one time where I had to draft a will for a fighter pilot. He left $5k to be given to his college’s fraternity with the stipulation that: 1) all of it had to be spent on alcohol, 2) it had to be spent all in one night, and 3) no alcohol could be left over after the party ends….
A pretty sweet deal when you think about it. And then he wanted the quote “Last round is on me, boys” to be included right after. That guy was such a cool dude that he brought in donuts when we notarized his will. I couldn’t wait to find out how that “night on him” turned out, since the fraternity promised to send us some pictures. Reddit user: meatygazell
Money for Your Attendance
My dad is a lawyer and has a bunch of weird stories, but for this particular question, I have only one good story. Basically, there was this one old man with three sons. When he died, he wanted three things; the first was that he wanted his sons to have a fistfight and whoever won would take all the money. This obviously didn’t pass, and they ended up splitting everything into thirds….
The second was that he wanted his grave to be shaped like a pyramid. You know why? It wasn’t because he had a thing for Egyptians of their culture. It was because his enemy said he’d take a dump on his grave when he died, so the old man’s logic was that he can’t take a dump on a pyramid-shaped grave. Genius actually….
The last was for the winner of the fistfight to make a feast and get a live band at this funeral so they could dance around his grave. Obviously none of the above were actually fulfilled. My dad says that when he was reading the will to the sons, they looked mortified, and my dad had to call his friend from the office next to him to witness their reactions. It was truly amazing. Reddit user: thesadbudhist
Puddin’ and the Roommate
My mom’s uncle, who was a priest when he was alive, specified that everyone who attended his funeral would receive $1,000. The kicker was that absolutely no one, except his lawyer, knew this until after the funeral. In fact, the lawyer was instructed to come to the wake (after the funeral) and read this little tidbit out in front of all the attendees….
Lots of fighting and resentment in the family ensued once it became known. “Well, I would have come if I knew” and “I should get the $1,000 even though I didn’t attend because I was sick and I had every intention to come,” etc. It was a great way to stir things up a bit from the grave! Reddit user: aldol941
But the Catch Is…
A client once demanded that I create a life estate for her roommate. But the life at issue was a cat. For the non- lawyers, here’s roughly how it read. “My residence shall be inhabitable free of rent by my roommate, [roommate’s name], so long as “Puddin’” [a cat] is alive. Upon the death of [Roommate] or Puddin,’ my residence shall pass to my grandchildren in fee simple….”
I couldn’t come up with any reason why it wouldn’t be enforceable, but I had real concerns that the grandchildren would never get the house so long as the roommate could keep finding a gray cat to play the role of Puddin’. But that was like 30 years ago, and Puddin is doing great! Reddit user: honestmango
Pouring Sugar on Redheads
I used to do tutoring in a really nice house with a ton of land. It was in the middle of a pretty big town with shops all around it. It turns out that the lady who owned the house left everything for the local council, which was several million dollars, in addition to her entire house and all the land….
The only catch was that the council was not allowed to change her house in any way. Meaning they were not allowed to change her ugly curtains or brocade sofas. Sure, they could take things out temporarily to get them cleaned, but they had to put them back. It’s why there was an 18th-century home in a busy shopping district. Reddit user: LIyre
Only If He’s Mine
I can think of two situations where people put some weird stuff in their wills. One was a wealthy physician who left the income in trust for his sister and niece, and upon their deaths, a scholarship would be established. That part was normal. The scholarship was for 5′ 8″ redheaded males who could place an ancestor on the Mayflower. But there’s more….
They also had to be studying medicine. It stipulated that on no account could they have studied or have practiced as a chiropractor. Basically, he wanted a scholarship for people just like him: those who looked like him and wanted to be what he was. Another was a lady who specified that Def Leppard’s ‘Pour Some Sugar On Me’ be played at her funeral. Reddit user: primeirofilho
The Post-Death Rager
A client directed that her grandson would receive 30% of her estate at her death, but only after passing a DNA test. Apparently, his mother was “promiscuous,” and she only wanted him to receive money if he was blood-related. Not only was I shocked at her request, but I had to act like it was totally natural so as not to offend her….
But it was pretty cold because it’s not like that would’ve changed the past 18 years of her being his grandma! To me, it wouldn’t matter whether he got the money and/or estate or not because the grandson would always know she had doubts about him. I thought it was a horrible way to be remembered after your death. Reddit user: liveanddieinla
You Don’t Get This, You Don’t Get That
When I met my now wife, I thought it would be a great idea to take some initiative and map out my will so she doesn’t have to worry about too much after I pass away. My wife has clear instructions to use some of my life insurance to buy a dilapidated house out in the countryside, tie my corpse to a chair, and throw a raging party in my honor inside….
Afterward, when everyone is good and hammered, someone (not necessarily my wife; it may be too much for her) has to douse me in accelerant and burn the house to the ground with me still inside. Party ain’t over till the house (and me) is no more. Surprisingly, my lawyer let it fly. I’m not sure if it’s 100% legal or not though. I guess she’ll find out. Reddit user: mastachaos
Leaving It to the Not-So-Less Fortunate
I’m not a lawyer, but my grandmother’s will states: This son isn’t getting the gold ring because… this son isn’t getting my car because… my daughter isn’t getting my paintings because… and she roasted all of them except one son “because he’s responsible.” This woman actually took the time out to say who wasn’t getting what after she died….
I mean, it’s fair, and it’s her money and her possessions after all, but I’ve never heard of a will where people got roasted so badly. She’s still alive and in great health. But that’s not the worst part about all of this. The worst part is that she read it out loud to them all last year. It was pretty great. Reddit user: Darogaserik
A Series of Weird Wills
I had an ex-girlfriend whose grandmother had a good sense of humor when she was alive. She lived in a small but wealthy town where everyone owned huge houses and drove expensive cars. If you tell anyone around that area that you lived there, they would automatically think that you were beyond loaded. Which was true about 95% of the time….
In her will, she planned out how she wanted tea and crumpets served at her funeral, and if there was any money left from that, she wanted it donated to the less fortunate of the town. There is no one who is less fortunate in that town; she was basically making fun of the people who live there. Reddit user: KHC_23
Just in Case He’s Kidnapped
There have been so many weird things that I’m not sure where to start. But here goes. I once saw a request to put down the dogs if they were living at the time of the testator’s death. That one was super sad. The second was a bequest of a photograph to a daughter who obviously ticked the mom off. Her two siblings got to split the multimillion-dollar estate 50/50. She ONLY got the photograph….
Then there was a cash bequest for the cat’s care; it was mostly weird because I had to write a memo on it to send to the charitable beneficiaries. There was also the time I got directions to destroy all family cookbooks. It was so strange to me. I’m sure I’ll think of more later, but that’s all I have for now. Reddit user: trashpandalyfe
I had a Russian client once who was the son of an oligarch. His father created a trust that provided dispositive provisions for if he (the son) was kidnapped and not found within a certain number of months and days. And it totally freaked me out how detailed it was. I believe the will had a similar language too, but I can’t remember now….
Now that I think about it, I believe there was a separate document (in addition to the trust) that provided that his will should be effective to the extent he was kidnapped and not recovered within a certain period of time. If the time set out in the will was passed, the son was basically worthless. How weird is that? Reddit user: WASPyJewess