Two Minute Notice
Everyone hopes to eventually land their dream job. For most, this means kissing a few frogs before you find your prince. In other words, sometimes you have to take a few jobs that you don’t want in order to eventually find the one you do or figure out what sort of work you like the best.
What happens when you’ve had enough of the frogs, though? You quit. And if you’re anything like most people, you probably wish that you could quit with a flash of defiance. Throwing your coffee into your boss’ face, maybe? How you make that quitting statement is up to you, but these people decided to go out with a bang.
I put in my two weeks at a call center, and my supervisor (who was great the whole time I was there) said, “Yeah, I’m just gonna give you two weeks paid vacation. I know how done you are with this place. Put your notice in. I would have given it an hour before you called the first rude customer you got a name. Have a nice life, man; it’s been good working with you.”
Pompous Idiot
Wherever you are these days Chris…good call, you were 100 percent right. I hated that place and its customers. Reddit User: Pyrhhus
I worked in a Dallas office with a well-established company that had a new CEO. The CEO writes an all-company email with some sort of harmless “inspirational” message about how we are going to crush it and do well. A woman in accounting who’s mild-mannered and a hardcore Christian Texas lady does a “reply all” that says something like, “Like we believe a word that pompous idiot has to say.”
The Fast-Ball Burrito
She calmly got an empty box from the mailroom, packed up her desk, walked out to her car without saying a word to anyone, and drove away. She was never seen again. Reddit User: Makerbot2000
I went into a Taco John’s and ordered a super burrito with no tomatoes or black olives to go. He has it in his right hand and reaches up with his left to clear out the order on the monitor. He stops for a moment when he realizes that he messed up by putting everything on the burrito.
Til Next Time, Bro
He turns around and fires a 100 mph fast-ball burrito against the back wall. He walks into the back room, takes off his Taco John’s shirt, puts on a T-shirt, grabs his smokes and his drink, and heads out the back door. Reddit User: LeisureSuitLarry
A co-worker of mine at Subway when I was working during college quit with flair. Picture: it’s the lunch shift of one of the busiest shops in the area. Guy gets halfway through making a sandwich, looks at the customer and then our manager, and says,”Til next time, bro” and just walks out. He never came back, not even to pick up his final paycheck.
Yeah, He Said No
When I left to go back to school, I left 100 sticky notes in random places throughout the store that said “Til Next Time.” Everyone but the manager thought it was funny. Reddit User: scott1326
Way back when we were still in HS, my friend’s coworker was getting fed up with the supermarket they worked in. On his last day, a woman walks up to his line and tries to talk him into taking a bunch of expired coupons. He tells her he needs to check with his supervisor. He slowly pulls out a Jack in the Box from under his till and methodically places it on the scanner…and just starts cranking the thing….
They Let Everyone Go
When it finally pops, he looks her in the eye and just says, “Yeah, he said no,” takes off his smock, and walks out. Reddit User: ProlongedSuffering
I brought everyone into the conference room first thing one day to let everyone know that we were all out of a job and that today was everyone’s last day. I had everyone email me their resumes, and we went over everyone’s on the conference room projector and updated them over the course of the day.
April Fools
I then printed out “reference” sheets for everyone, and we all spent the remainder of the day writing letters of recommendation for each other. I ordered everyone pizza and bought everyone a round of drinks at the bar next door. Most folks had jobs by the end of the next week. Reddit User: shortadamlewis
I really liked my supervisor but really hated my job. He was a real cut above, so that made it livable. I got a new job and handed him my written two weeks’ notice. Just my luck, it was April 1st, and he didn’t believe me. Every day, I’d remind him how many days I had left. He started getting testy; he’d played a long game himself, but this was too much.
Never Promoted
I really was going, and I tried telling him multiple times. Apparently, he was quite surprised when I stopped showing up! Reddit User: Frugalista1
I worked at a job for over eight years. I was promised a promotion if I stayed when I was about ready to look for something else. I was called into the office down the road a bit to be informed that they were bringing in an ex-employee who had quit a year or two before for the job I was promised.
They Hired the Wrong Person
I had heard a rumor of this and had already made my decision. The boss looked shocked when I said I quit. I punched out and left. Simple but sweet. Reddit User: eac555
My cafe manager hired a shift leader from outside the company, which was full of young people like me who needed more hours and pay. The lead was fired the second week after three no-call no-shows, and when I asked my manager why he would hire someone with no experience over me or my coworkers, he said he would have to see me work in my current position for another year.
He Quit While She Was Talking
This is a job where they cap you under 28 hours. I told him I didn’t know what to say and that he could expect my two weeks’ notice. Reddit User: RelativeMinors
A person is helping a customer, who is not being nice at all. My coworker is generally a patient fellow, which is part of why managers would send the doozies to him. As this woman is droning on about how disappointed she is and how he is doing nothing for her, he is taking his work shirt off.
I Lost Them a Million Dollars
As he’s folding his shirt and waiting for her to finish her sentence, he lets her know that she (and people like her) are why he was quitting right now, in the middle of her session. That was it. Reddit User: brandnamenerd
My job told me that since they fired the other supervisor, I was just going to have to do his job from now on. My original job was insane, and now they expected me to double that with no compensation. I let a million dollars plus of shipments sitting in a trailer back in the corner and told all my guys, “Thanks for the hard work; our day is done.”
People Downstairs Could Hear Her
I quit that day, and the next day, I got a call with them freaking out about all the money they lost. I just hung up on the boss and never looked back. Reddit User: Peelboy
I told my manager (who was a chronic liar) that she was an absolutely horrible human being and that I quit. She had forced out two employees who had serious medical issues that were making them be “not perfect employees,” and somehow she was getting away with it. It was a bank I worked at, and I had compiled the data of all the customers she drove away; the bank had lost about 57 million at this point because of this woman.
We Are Sailing
She flipped out and was yelling loud enough that the people upstairs came downstairs to see who it was. Reddit User: Krunzuku
One of my guys and his wife came over for an evening and asked a ton of sailing questions. Later, I had gone sailing for nearly three months, and when I returned, there was the usual line-up of folks needing to talk. The first guy in line was the one who had taken an interest in sailing.
I’m Out!
They had gone to the Caribbean and took sailing lessons. He gave me his notice with a huge smile. They went back to the Caribbean and bought a boat. He managed to beat me out of the door by a couple of years. We are both still cruising. Reddit User: endlessbull
I loved my job but hated the way the operations manager and general manager treated me. I worked there for two years and was one of their best workers. One morning, I got into an argument with the manager, and it got so heated that when I was walking away from it, something just went off in my brain.
Tender My Resignation
I turned around (the manager was talking to all of his supervisors at the time) and yelled, “Two weeks and I’m out!” For the next two weeks, I left when I wanted to and didn’t care what anyone said. Reddit User: thatkidjosh_
I worked for an inventory company famous for being in trouble for labor issues. I ended up getting scheduled to work an afternoon and an overnight, all immediately followed by driving a 13-passenger van 40 miles upstate. About 4 hours of actual sleep availability over 48 hours on top of life responsibilities AND a second job.
The Money Is There
I was told if I called out, I could “tender my resignation.” I waited until three hours before my shift to call my manager in the middle of the night to tell her I was doing just that. Reddit User: movingtarget4616
I got a “promotion” from cashier to key holder and was given manager responsibilities, like closing registers, scheduling, opening and closing the store, cleaning, shipment, etc. I asked for the 50 cent raise that I deserved, and my boss denied me twice. So, I super glued 50 cents to the store owner’s cherished antique leather top desk and brought her into the office.
Soul Man
I pointed to the desk where she counted her money every day and said, “I hope this will help you understand what it feels like to know the money is there, but you can’t have it! I QUIT!” Reddit User: lost_n_found
Singer Ray Charles was notoriously hard to work for. At one part of his show, during the song “Soul Man,” Ray would ask the question “What am I?” and the band would respond, “You’re a soul man!” Bassist Tom Fowler had decided to quit the band and had let the other musicians in on it.
I Get Paid by the Hour
The next time they played “Soul Man” and they got to the part where Ray asked the band, “What am I?” Tom yelled, “You’re a jerk!” and walked off the stage. Reddit User: Lumbergod
Walking out at the end of my last day of a retail job I had in college, I was cornered by a customer who kept asking me where to find things. I explained that I was off the clock and not actually an employee any longer. I reiterated that I just clocked out because I quit. Despite this, she kept badgering me. Eventually, I figured out she wasn’t going to be let down easily.
Told My Least Favorite Manager I Quit
I just muttered, “Look, lady, I get paid by the hour, not by the rude customer. Go find your own sweatpants.” And then I walked out. Reddit User: probablyclickbait
I worked for Disney. It was long hours with little pay, and I was struggling to eat and pay my bills enough that I wasn’t homeless. I didn’t qualify for food stamps or government aid because I made too much money. I found a new job after working there a year and a half, so at the end of my last shift, I turned in my ID and told my least favorite manager I was quitting.
Paychecks for Less Than $10
Since almost everyone I liked there was on Facebook, I posted my goodbye message on my feed. Reddit User: gothiclg
I was working at a supermarket when I was in HS. I quit to work a summer job that paid under the table. They told me I could be re-hired at the end of summer, and surprisingly, they stuck to their word. The problem was, they were barely scheduling me, which led to a paycheck that was somewhere between $5-7 after all the union fees. This prompted me to start looking for another job. My boss proceeded to tell me “I was screwing her over.”
Sabrina Is Satan
I told her my paychecks that were less than $10 were screwing me over more and hung up on her. Reddit User: bangersnmash13
Every shift, we had to read through a literal binder of notes from other employees asking for time off or information about what needed to be done later in the day. It was tedious, and most people just initialed saying they read it but didn’t. When I realized I wasn’t getting enough hours to justify the terrible work environment, I decided I wanted to quit.
You Really Ruined My Plan
So I did so via the binder. I wrote something along the lines of “If this place is hell, then Sabrina makes a very convincing Satan!” and left it for all to read. Reddit User: MeggieAC
I always did my job efficiently and quickly, much to the envy of others. I found out my manager was promoting the person below me to my level, and instead of moving me up, I would now have to compete with the person who used to report to me. My manager told me this news, smiled, and asked me what I thought of the new plan. I smiled and said I thought it was excellent.
Trick or Treat
Two weeks later, I accepted a job for almost twice as much money. I handed my notice in, and my manager said, “Oh, you really ruined my plan.” Reddit User: [redacted]
I came in on my off day at a call center (happened to be Oct. 31) to talk to my manager and give her my notice that I was quitting. I also brought my toddler to work that day, because there was trick or treating going on and it was encouraged by management. I chatted with my boss and told her that I would be quitting, effective immediately, as I had a better job lined up.
She Got Let Go
We argued about it for a minute, but then my daughter walked up, ready to go with her loot, and I never looked back. Reddit User: Tyrango
My gal got let go by her old agency; she was working as a publicist for a small-time place that abused their authors and workers alike. We’re talking let’s acquire 90 books a month and really only care about three of them, or let’s expect someone to work on and rep 20-40 new books a month. Or let’s pay a fraction to the authors and our pros what anyone else would.
This Is Change
Within two weeks, she landed a job in an agency that today is one of the most prominent in the country. Reddit User: cyrre
I worked as a valet at the Fountainebleau on South Beach in Miami. One of the guys there was getting an old couple’s SUV from the garage (he was quitting that day), and when he came back, they handed him a $10 bill. The customer told him, “Can I get change?” and he went, “This is change,” walked back to the office, picked up his stuff, and left.
Three Weeks of Pay
He was never seen again. The mouths of the couple dropped as he walked away, and I can’t blame them. Reddit User: [redacted]
I worked in a place with all women. It was catty drama nonsense every day. I gave it half a year, went to my boss with the intention to quit, and explained how I felt about working there. The boss and I came to a mutual agreement that I wanted to leave, she paid me for three weeks, and she told me she hoped I found something I loved.
Party Like It’s 1999
I still haven’t found that something via career, but still, three weeks paid. I guess she didn’t want the reputation of the place ruined. Not sure. Reddit User: WildJackJack
I used to work at the casinos in Las Vegas, so every holiday meant I worked. Christmas, Thanksgiving, everything. I was swing shift, so I always worked 9 pm to 5 am. So it was Dec. 1999, and I did not want to miss the biggest party in 1,000 years, so I said I wanted that day off. They literally laughed and said, “No way.” I said, “I’m getting it off one way or another.” They said, “No you’re not.”
How Do I Quit?
So a few days before Dec 31 rolled around, I quit my casino gig with no backup job. I partied like it was 1999. Reddit User: [redacted]
I had been working a temporary job while I was waiting to be hired at another place. I worked at this temp place for a little over 3 months. It was your usual job, and I didn’t have anything to complain about, but it was my very first experience in the workplace.
I’ll Call You Back
My parents still haven’t let me forget the day I heard that I got the next job/position, because I called them saying, “Mom, how do I quit my job?” I realized that everything prepares you for how to apply and fill out those forms, but no one told me the steps for quitting. Reddit User: Ndvorsky
I called out legit sick one day and got in contact with an assistant manager. He told me I needed a doctor’s note or I would lose my job. I was a college student working at Zaxby’s; I didn’t have doctor visit money for something like a cold. I was scheduled for the next day, and I didn’t show up (of course).
Do You Work Here?
The general manager called me, asking where I was. I told him that the assistant manager essentially fired me the day before, and all I got was, “Uhhhh…okay, I’ll call you back.” Never heard from them again. Reddit User: magkneesium
I worked at a pizza place during school and for a while after my high school years. Several years later, I went to that restaurant to order dinner. The kitchen was really busy, so I asked the boss if I could just go back and make my own order. I made my order, then I made a few more while my food cooked. She asked suspiciously, “Do you work here?”
You’re All Morons
I took off my apron, tossed it in the hamper under the counter, picked up my food, said, “Not anymore,” and walked out the door. Reddit User: HawaiianShirtsOR
My dad was working as a development team lead for a local government IT project that has a national government legally mandated deadline. Fast forward to three months from the deadline; less than a quarter of the necessary functions are even developed, let alone tested. During the monthly status meeting, the managers are still discussing whether they want the software to do this or that and whose department gets the budget for it, etc.
I Won’t Be Back
So my father stands up, says, “You’re all a bunch of morons,” and walks out. At least he didn’t have to deal with that crisis! Reddit User: NoAstronomer
I emailed HR and started two months of short term disability. At the end of the two months, I wrote an email to all of the human resources department, my boss, her boss, and the CEO explaining how I was treated and that I wouldn’t be coming back. I had eight voicemails from the day I went into the hospital, all from my boss.
He Was “Sick”
She was screaming at me to call her back and whatnot. I attached all those to a fresh email and sent them to everyone again, turned in the phone, and didn’t look back. Reddit User: Bendingtherules333
One of my coworkers put in his two weeks, and the company didn’t let him cash out his PTO or schedule any vacation hours, so every day for the first week, he would call in with some insane disease. He called and told our boss he was sick with measles, yellow fever, mumps, chickenpox, and that he broke his leg to forcibly use the PTO.
Farewell Gathering
They asked him after the first week not to come back and fired him anyway. He got a whole week of PTO though, so I wouldn’t complain if I were him. Reddit User: Mylittleboxofrages
I gave my boss soft notice that I was enlisting in the Navy and about 3 months of hard notice once I had a departure date. I loved that job. My last 3 months there were spent enjoying (most of) my coworkers’ company, training people on tasks in which I was “the guy,” and not burning any bridges.
Chopped Soup
On my last day, we had a farewell gathering in the conference room with pizza paid for by the GM, and our weather guy gave me a shout-out on the air. Reddit User: unblessedpants
Butcher at a supermarket here. I’ve had some really bad employers, and I used to have to make them fire me because that way I wouldn’t have to wait two months for a social security payment. I had a store manager work me out and play hardball. I ended up forcing his hand by quietly and calmly going onto shop floor, grabbing a cart, and filling it with stuff to slice that you really don’t want or need to slice, like tubs of yogurt, boxes of cereal, pouches of soup, etc.
T-I-M
I went back to my bench and kept slicing stuff until I was fired. It certainly didn’t take long after that! Reddit User: Fogdood
Not me but my current boss. His name is Tim, and one time, he was at his very first job as a salesman in a hardware store. So one day, he was told by his boss to run the store by himself for three hours and close alone without knowing how. He took off his work shirt, walked to the door, and said, “You don’t spell team ‘T-I-M’” and threw his shirt behind his shoulder as he walked out.
I Never Liked Working Here Anyway
He ended up becoming the new manager of that hardware store, and I work for him as a salesman. Reddit User: urlocalhunner
Apparently, one of the temps at my old work got completely wasted at the work Christmas party, then showed up the next morning at 8 am (right on time), downed half a bottle of champagne in a single hit, said to nobody in particular “I never liked working here anyway,” and left.
I Don’t Work for You
Nobody ever heard from her again, and her contract still had three weeks left. HR made a tactical decision to leave it for a few days until they could declare she had “abandoned” her job and then got another temp in, who never heard how her predecessor left. Reddit User: fresnel28
I had a terrible job doing a promotional event that would never give me hours. I would call in every day, and maybe once or twice a week they would schedule me for a shift. Got sick of it pretty quickly. So rather than calling in, I went and got another job. I didn’t hear from the first job until two months later, when they were doing an event and needed all hands on deck.
Pizza Party
I told them I didn’t work for them anymore and hung up. I didn’t hear from them again after that. Reddit User: kitskill
I bought like 10 pizzas from an Old Chicago and had them delivered to where I worked. Not for management. Not for anyone but the people I worked with. Everyone was like, “What’s this for?” “Today is my last day here.” “Wait, and you’re buying pizzas for everyone?” “Yeah, why not.” “…that’s really cool man. Thank you.”
One Person Is Laid Off
I did it at my next job too. I’ve come to the conclusion that if you quit your job and you buy pizza for everyone then, well, people can’t exactly completely hate you. Reddit User: Cheeze_It
I had worked for a large financial institution for 12 years. The company decided there would be massive layoffs. My boss required me to submit to him by the end of that day the name of one of my employees to be laid off. After a quick phone call to my girlfriend, I walked into my boss’ office with a piece of paper with the name of the person in my department to be laid off.
I can remember his jaw dropping when he read it; it was my own name. I never regretted that decision. Reddit User: NWBoomer