Blessing In Disguise
What do high-profile names like JK Rowling, Oprah Winfrey, and Robert Downey Jr. have in common? They’ve all started over in life after a series of hardships, and came out stronger than ever. While life may seem like a rat race, the bottom line is that it’s never too late to start anew, and become happier than ever before, even (or especially) if you’re over the age of 40.
No matter how low or behind you may feel in life, there’s plenty of time to start fresh and achieve your goals. From countless divorces and failed businesses to one-way tickets to new beginnings, these uplifting tales of people who only hit it big after turning 40 might just renew your hope for life…
The Simple Life
Sometimes life is like a romcom, and not in a good way. My husband cheated and left almost two years ago. Best day of my life. I have since moved states, made new friends with similar interests, and gone back to school. This CAN be done! It was never easy, but it can happen. Also, therapy. Don’t be afraid to talk about your issues.
In short, I’ve learned that it’s much better to be single and happy than to be with the wrong person and unhappy, and heartbreak can even lead you down the path you were meant to be on in the first place- if you let it. Reddit user: luckyox42
No More Family Ties
At 35, I got divorced, and I felt like my life just went downhill fast. So I went to a Buddhist monastery and became a monk for seven years. I then disrobed and moved to a city with absolutely nothing, not even clothes. From there, I began slowly, and over the course of two years have built myself a beautiful, happy life.
It takes a lot of guts to leave everything you know behind and become a monk, so I don’t necessarily recommend it to everyone. But drastic emotional events can lead to drastic shifts in perception. Embrace those shifts, instead of running away from them. Reddit user: BodhiBill
Finding My Way Home
My father died just last year when I was 53 years old. He left us each just a few dollars. My wife and I decided to leave the state, leaving my mother and siblings (and all their drama); we cut ties with them. It was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make, but it was time for me to choose sanity over family.
While it’s never nice to say goodbye to family, there are times we need to do what’s right for us and our well-being. I don’t recommend this for everyone, but you only get one life, and sometimes you have to make very difficult choices in order to start over in your pursuit of peace and happiness. Reddit user: Wrong_Answer_Willie
Veteran Woes
About a year and a half ago, I left my husband after 10 years together, as we weren’t happy. I then got into a relationship with someone, and that has just ended, as it wasn’t something that could last. I was sad and lonely, and a bit scared, but I woke up one day and realized- I have my health, my finances are not terrible, I have a sweet dog, and I’ve got a whole family back home that misses me.
I’m currently looking into moving 400 miles back home. I’m hopeful to find someone special to share my life with, but I also know that I have so much good in my life already, and love myself for who I am. Love, much like charity, begins at home. Reddit user: pocket_cucco
Not The Science Guy
I spent most of my adult life in the Army, but was discharged after getting wounded. It was one of those “Forrest Gump” wounds where you’re not physically disabled but the military doesn’t want to deal with you anymore. My plan was to retire from the Army in my 50s.
Instead, I had to use the GI Bill to go to college and get a degree. I graduated when I was almost 40. I then got a job as a cubicle monkey in an office. It seemed like my time in the Army was just a dream, because every day it felt farther and farther away. Then one day I was promoted to manager, figured out a few things, and ended up starting my own company. I now employ several ex-veterans. Reddit user: [Redacted]
A New State Of Mind
Ever wake up one day and realize that you’re in the wrong career? Nearly every day? I really know how that feels. I started over at 39. Switched over into mainframe programming, which is actually a lot more exciting and engaging than it sounds. I was a scientist beforehand. The change was totally worth it.
It was scary at first to consider jumping into something entirely new so “late,” but after a few months of bumpy road, I realized how much more fun I was having, and have never looked back since. Reddit user: [redacted]
Double Take
Human beings are nothing without their beliefs, ideas, and hobbies, and picking up a few new ones is a great way to get a fresh start. My dad is in his late 40s, and he started to practice a new religion. He’s been a much more well rounded human being since then, and I can say we’ve become closer than ever.
Some guys buy a new car as they approach 50, while others take on a new set of beliefs. The latter is a far more spiritually and longer-lasting type of fulfillment, and I would strongly discourage people from seeking materialism as a solution for emptiness. Reddit user: cyrenns
Breaking Free
Restarted at 30. New country, new job, and new life. I’m 41 now, working in the same industry but in a different field. Will definitely reboot life again before 50. While I’d love to play a wild card and go really left field with my next move, I have 2 kids under 2 now, and may need to take a different approach to the previous time.
I want to make sure that the kids don’t feel like their life is unstable by my moving around so much, but I also know that the next exciting challenge awaits. The key for me has been to embrace change, even with all the potential challenges that arise with it. Change has been the one constant in my life that I’ve been grateful for. Reddit user: [redacted]
From Film Sets To Classrooms
Are you ready for this? Well I’m 40 years old, and I started over earlier this month. My husband cheated on me, after I had our baby 6 months ago. At first it was horrifyingly painful, but I quickly went into survival mode: sorted out a house, my finances, work, childcare, gym, and therapy. Definitely therapy.
I’ve set myself some goals to help get through the next year, and I’m going to right this ship, big time. I’m not saying I’m not sad anymore, but I’m going to take this as an opportunity to begin a new and exciting chapter. I believe the best is yet to come. Reddit user: May26th
Trying To Move Forward
Degree in film, worked in Hollywood. Late thirties, realized I was a decent screenwriter but not amazing. Saw a bunch of bitter failed screenwriters working around the industry that all hated their day jobs and looked 10 years older than they actually are, and realized I didn’t want to be one of them.
At 40, I moved back to where I grew up. I’m now back in college studying physics to become a science teacher. So happy now. I love physics, I love learning, and I love the meaning that I’ve found by connecting with real people. Reddit user: TheRealMarklar
Investing In Yourself
At 40, I had to restart my life. I kind of feel like I never really started. I had a uni degree, I’d traveled, I painted, but life wasn’t going anywhere. I had $30 in my bank account, and then lost my retail job. I really thought it was the end of the road for me.
Then one day while working out at the gym, I made friends with this guy. We started working out together (considering I had nothing but free time), and before I knew it he brought me in to work for him in the wellness industry. We recently just launched our fifth new supplement of the year, and I’m currently earning about 8x what I was making working retail just three years ago. I also met my fiancee through my work, as she’s a fitness rep for another company in the industry. Life has turned out quite nicely! Reddit user: [Redacted]
Goodbye Wife, Hello New Life
I restarted everything. A business went bad, and a partner and I ended up suing each other. I didn’t go bankrupt, but there were definitely days that I didn’t answer the phone because I knew it was a bill collector. I went back to school and began an engineering career.
It was REALLY DIFFICULT, and I couch surfed for a few months toward the end, but I ended up doing okay. I really like my new life (and I ultimately ended up pretty much winning the lawsuits, too). Today I control my own business 100%, and things have grown exponentially. Reddit user: picksandchooses
Full-Time Caretaker
I’m 48 and got divorced two years ago after being married for 28 years (I started young). I don’t blame my ex; I can be a pretty boring person, and she was unhappy, so she needed the change. I still have bouts where I miss things, but the last three years were very hard. At least now when I go home it’s peaceful and quiet.
Just started to figure out the whole starting over thing; I’m not the best at meeting people, but I tried, and eventually met someone so perfect for me. Everything is effortless, and I love my life now. I no longer feel inadequate or worthless, and I get to watch all the Brit-coms and Marx brothers movies I want now. Reddit user: Redfish1971
We Believe In You
I’m 56, and my wife had a major medical emergency. She was given 10 months to live and yet survived. We have a 9-year-old daughter, and so I became a single dad with a wife with serious brain injuries. My wife is slowly recovering, but I will need to look after her for the rest of her life.
I do not get much support, and it will be very hard, but you do whatever you need to do when you love someone. Since all of this happened, I’ve discovered just how much I’m capable of, and have a newfound appreciation and love for myself. Reddit user: aussiegreenie
She Left And I Thrived
At the age of 40, I got sober. Shortly thereafter, I started having flashbacks to early childhood neglect. Previously I had not known my parents were so abusive; I always said they were wonderful, and I badly idealized them throughout my teens and twenties. Got flashbacks, panicked, went to rehab.
I have been in therapy ever since. Didn’t go back to my previous career (banking), didn’t know what I wanted to do in life anymore. Cut out my parents from my life years ago due to the abuse and cut out old friends due to the party lifestyle and trying to be sober.
Now, no more contact with abusive family. No more contact with old friends, no more contact with old partners. I definitely ended that life. My new life is one of meaning, deep connection, and a new career in spiritual exploration. I wish I could’ve seen this all sooner. Reddit user: [redacted]
Getting Clean Saved Me
My wife decided that being with some random guy from 3,000 miles away was a better alternative to being with me, so she took off, leaving me and our kids, and a job she’d been at for 18 years behind (she was also about to get a pension). At first, it was really tough. I didn’t know what I was going to do. Gradually, things got better.
I got a decent job and moved us to a different state. Started making more money than I ever had and lived in a much better area. Now, it’s about 8 years later, and things are going great. I have a great job, live in a more than decent area, and make more money than her and her latest victim combined. My kids are all out of the house, all happy, and I get to travel the world, and have a puppy to keep me company. I’m about to close and pay cash for a new house too. Reddit user: BannedforTypingTruth
New Job, New Me
I decided it was time to quit drinking. My wife had moved out (separated), and I couldn’t function without drinking vodka. I was on the verge of getting a DWI, losing my job, etc. I went into detox and got clean. My wife came back, got a nice raise at work, and I’ll be one year sober soon.
Everything is looking great for me right now. Normal life, family back together, I couldn’t be happier right now. All thanks to the one decision that made everything possible- choosing to love myself enough to end the alcohol toxicity. Reddit user: bobdigi36
Learning To Accept Loss
While I was fine at my job, it was extremely high stress, and I knew that in about a decade I would be well beyond my threshold for tolerating it. I had already tried multiple pursuits in this particular career path, and while I don’t regret the time spent, I knew it wouldn’t work for me until retirement.
I figured I would make the change while there was still ample time to do it, so I decided to learn something radically different. And that’s how I went from working in a psychiatric hospital to a research lab. Reddit user: chunwookie
Fueled By Loss
I ran a business, things got rocky, girl left due to superficial stuff and lack of money, had to sell my home to pay off debt, had my back against the wall completely broke, dad had recently passed away. Depression and chronic anxiety got so bad that I could barely function.
It wasn’t fun, but one step at a time, I’ve turned it around. Not everything since then has gone well, but when you hit rock bottom and work your way out of it, it’s liberating. I can accept loss now; it’s just a part of life. I also learned that success is more about happiness than it is about money.
That means being who you truly are and embracing it unapologetically. Of course, we all need money and things, but not as much as we think we do. I wouldn’t change a thing. Reddit user: Saganic
Off To Australia
Rewind to this time last year. I was happily married for the second time to a wonderful woman. Her son had left home, my son had left home, and we were left with my daughter, who was 15. I had worked in a secondary school (in the UK) for nearly 10 years. I decided that I wanted to do my teacher training. My wife happily agreed, so I investigated. Basically, £40k tax-free for 10 months of training, so my life was looking pretty good. She was very happy at work, I was looking forward to training, and my daughter had completed her GCSEs.
I headed to China as part of the school stuff. I landed in Beijing, jet lagged and tired, and texted my wife. No reply. Many texts later over the next few hours, still no reply. At just after 11pm Beijing time, my world ended. I got a phone call from the British police to tell me that my wonderful beautiful wife had passed away in her sleep, only 12 hours after I left her. It took me 2 days to get an emergency exit visa and three days to get home. All our plans and dreams of a life together vanished, and I was left with my daughter and another nine months of teacher training, when all I wanted to do was cry.
I have no choice now but to start again. I doubt I’ll ever get over this loss, but having been married before, I always said I would never marry again, and then I did. My wife was so incredible that I had to. She made life worth living and helped me become a far better person in the 7 years that we had together. Now it’s time for me to take all the lessons and wisdom she gave me, and to use it all for something worthwhile. My life will be dedicated to her, and I’ll never stop loving her. Reddit user: acairns99
Good Luck All Of You
After graduating, I lucked into a position that I’m really good at. At almost the perfect time to get into the IT security industry, I quickly got noticed in the industry and within a couple of years got headhunted by one of the largest companies in the world to build a new managed services offering for them. As I approached 40, I was earning a spectacular amount of cash and traveling the world fixing problems for massive companies and governments alike, but I was also working 6 days a week, 14-16 hours a day. Since I could easily work on three different continents in one week, I had very little in the way of a social life.
And my health was declining. My last remaining relative that I cared about (my father) came down ill in a country with an American-style health care system, and three months of treatment and remodeling his home for his new requirements blew through over a million bucks super fast, and he still passed away. With my deteriorating health, I came to the realization that while I could easily make the money back, it wasn’t worth it. I quit and moved to Australia, where I now work in a much more relaxed government position, and have a family of my own. Money can’t buy happiness. I know it’s a catch-phrase, but it’s true. Reddit user: Fenrir101
Still Living With My Parents
Training for my 3rd career after serving 22 years in the army in two different trades. Being in university at this age means a small peer group and an even smaller group of friends. I fear not being able to take care of my aging parents; I’m only figuring my life out right now.
Reading between the lines of my life story is the hidden narrative of common themes. I won’t give them names, but you know what they are. Good luck all of you. Reddit user: TouchedByaHellsAngel
Back To College At 42
Sometimes you think the days of midnight curfews and your mom insisting on doing your laundry for you are behind you, until they’re not. See Exhibit A. Got in a ton of trouble in the financial crisis. Moved in with my parents again at 39. Moved out again at 41. Whew!
The good news is that while parents can be annoying, they’re still there to help you out when you need it, no matter your age. Those two years were honestly amazing. Family is everything, and it sometimes takes a heavy reminder to get back to that point of recognizing it. Reddit user: ajegwu
Proud Geek Dad
When I was 38, the place I worked at began to downsize and let staff go. I had no qualifications or third level education and was pretty much unemployable if I was to be made redundant. So I went part time, went to university, and earned my degree at the age of 42.
Completely new career; I switched from system administrator to health care. The four years of uni was challenging. I am not the smartest person, so had to learn how to learn again. And going from a very well paid job to the student/part-time lifestyle sucked a bit too. But it was definitely worth it. We now live in a new country.
I have been qualified for 5 years, earn about a third of what I did before but am 100% more content and happy. Only regret is not having the guts to change careers sooner. Reddit user: NutellaPatella
39 And Feeling Fine
I got divorced at 30, took my daughter and left. I started going to school for IT, ended up getting into database stuff and getting certified in Oracle. I lived with my parents for a long time while starting over, which was tough but nowhere near as tough as it seems.
Especially since I had no time for a personal life anyway. I ended up getting a good job and buying a condo and raising my daughter as a single father for a while. Now I just got done with moving my daughter out to California to start a career as a software engineer.
I am as proud as a geek dad can be, and I find myself wondering what to do next. I am 51 years old, and I have never had more options available to me. Reddit user: imk
Karma Is Real
Only 39, but I blew up my life this year. Lost the job I’d had for 20 years due to a health issue. Went from making 6 figures per year to being on food stamps and government health benefits. Spent the better part of 9 months figuring out what the health issue was and fixing it.
Sold my house and moved from a major metropolitan area to a town of 40k people. Found a job making 1/4 of what I used to in a different industry that feeds my soul. Honestly, I’d highly recommend it. Never been happier. Reddit user: no_salt_just_lime
One Awkward Moment
My mom cheated on my dad and divorced him at around 44. My dad was miserable for a year or two until he found a lady that he ended up marrying. Now he’s much happier than when he was with my mom. Like by a wide margin. However, my mom has now divorced her second husband.
Looks like karma came around for both mom and dad. Just remember that difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations. Don’t get off the road just because of a few speed bumps. Reddit user: [redacted]
I Paid More Attention To My Health
Your life can change dramatically in one devastating moment, as I unfortunately learned recently at age 39. My husband walked out on me because I interrupted him and his girlfriend at the bar. I was scared and didn’t want to start over. I didn’t know if I had it in me.
I just had to learn to love myself harder and find somebody who treats me right. Eventually I did it, and began to see things as they truly were. I’ve never been happier, and frankly I deserve it. Reddit user: BeansByHerself
One Word: Awwww
At 41, I suffered an ear infection and lost balance on the left side of my body. As part of my physical therapy, I started commuting year-round by bicycle. It’s been three years of year-round bike commuting. Last year, I estimate that I drove my car less than 3,000 miles.
The bike has greatly helped my general health and balance. In addition, bike commuting is a self-funding hobby. Think about how much people spend on gas and car repairs. Reddit user: colodogguy
Funny Guy
I’ve started over so many times I’ve lost count. I’m 53 now. I spent my late teens and 20s in a religious order, half of my 30s getting a PhD, and got my first teaching job at 37. In my 40s, I married a woman almost two decades younger than me.
After 11 years of marriage (and two wonderful kids), she realized she was gay and bolted. Where am I now? On my couch surfing the web while my girls are doing a LOTR movie marathon just 5 feet in front of me. I know this definitely sounds trite, but I have to get it out there.
All the wandering, wrong turns, mistakes, ridicule, and pure idiocy of my life are worth it every time I look at them. I couldn’t be more blessed. Reddit user: guntherhasatazer
You Can Too
Quit my job in corporate America and jumped right into comedy. I started with stand up (which I’m pretty terrible at) and now I’m writing content for YouTube and TV and perform improv every week. I’m still learning the ropes of this world and making a lot less money than I was.
But I don’t have to put on pants in the morning, so it’s worth it. Be willing to make a scary jump. Reddit user: [redacted]
Life Just Gets Better
I’d like to tell you about my dad. He and my mom split when he was 36. She took everything. He was left with a truck and a box of stuff. He had to move to see the kids. Moving cost him his job. Knowing he needed to start over, he started learning a new trade.
It was alongside a bunch of 18-22-year-old kids. Literally had to start over from scratch, getting a first apartment, new dishes, everything. 25 years later he’s at the top of his trade, outlasted many of the kids, married to a nice lady, and owns a couple acres, a new truck, and a sports car.
He’s fully covered for retirement, even though he couldn’t start saving until around 40. I guess what I’m saying is I watched this average man with no education who had a good work ethic lose everything and he’s now doing better than most people his age. Reddit user: [redacted]
41 And Having Fun
I went back to school for a field that was completely unrelated to my current work and divorced my emotionally dead spouse. 10 years later I have the best job ever and am happily married to someone 20 years younger. Life just gets better if you listen to your inner self and take some chances.
Consider the safety net you can put in place for yourself to make the jump easier, then go for it. Reddit user: anothermochaplz
Got Me A Government Job
I started over at 41. Fled from a 19-year marriage gone toxic, hadn’t held a full-time job in almost a decade at that point. Moved to another town, lived in a friend’s basement while I looked for work and negotiated the divorce, couldn’t find a job that would pay the rent, started panicking.
Eventually got a job offer from a different state where I knew no one: a job where they were mostly hiring people half my age straight out of school for entry-level positions. So I moved again and started from scratch. That was 6 years ago. Now this new town is my home.
I have a career (that one I started from nothing) where I’m respected and well-paid. I have friends, and I’m so very glad I started over, even though I thought it was really late to do so. Reddit user: localgyro
Future So Bright, I Need Shades
I started over at 42. That’s when I told myself, “I’ve gotta get me a government job.” I did, and I absolutely hated it, but it came with a savings plan, pension, medical insurance, etc. Retired a mere 18 years later and along the way got a new awesome wife and step-kids.
Don’t sweat the small stuff, because it IS all small stuff. Don’t regret the wasted time; you learn something new every day. Consider yourself ready for anything; you can beat everything. Reddit user: PaPaw85713
Never Too Late To Be Happy
At 35, I was working for a (landline) phone company and absolutely hated it. I was let go for not making quotas. It was the best day of my life. I was free from the job, but what to do next? I went back to college and got a bachelor’s degree.
My wife also was stuck in a dead-end job and went to school for an associate’s degree. Imagine 2 adults and 3 school-aged kids all studying at the kitchen table. That was almost 20 years ago now. The point is that it’s really never too late to reinvent yourself. I am working a full-time job, and the owner wants to start another business. The future for both jobs is great. But if everything failed, I would just start over. Reddit user: boredordepressed
Taking The Plunge
I had to start over at 41. I had $10 and no assets to my name. Divorced, kids taken to another country. Extremely depressed. Turned myself around. Remarried. New baby last year. Closed on a house this morning, we are moving in tomorrow. Happy with my job. It is never too late to be happy.
Happiness is something you absolutely deserve, and it’s always within reach. You just need to fight for it. Reddit user: [redacted]
I Got A One-Way Ticket
I’m 39; I’ve been working in system administration for 20 years, and the last 10 years for the same company. Last week, I decided I had enough and quit (or took a year off). I’ve always wanted to do something more creative, so this year I’m going to dive into game development.
I have to say that I never got a mortgage or had kids, and I have a good amount of money I’ve saved through the years, so in my case, I have to say that I couldn’t be happier. Reddit user: glasslicker
A Whole New Job
I found out my ex-wife was not only cheating on me but had modified documents in a complex way to screw me financially. I left my house, ex-wife, and job. Sold everything and boarded a plane with a single backpack and a one-way ticket. You can’t escape yourself, but you can escape others.
It’s not always you holding yourself back, but others, and it’s okay to go your own way when you need to. Reddit user: kenfury
I always thought I would be successful at business. I went to college, did well, and worked my way to the top ranks of the company I eventually went to work for. I thought I would eventually be one of the owners of the business. At age 38, I had a serious medical issue that I continue to struggle with today at 45.
I ended up quitting my job and becoming a stay-at-home dad. So my life completely changed. I can tell you there is always time to change, and there is always time to re-evaluate what is important in your life. I now manage my health and prioritize it, but couldn’t be more thankful. That job was basically meaningless, and it prevented me from watching my kids grow up. I’m in a much better place today. Reddit user: davemchine